Dog’s Collection of Journal Entries & Drawings from Day 100 of the Apocalypse (NOT His Favorite!):
Today was NOT my favorite day, but I do not want to forget it. I was leaving a long pee-mail message on a fire hydrator when I saw New Friend playing chase with Cat. I can play chase much better than Cat, so I ran after them. Then I tripped on New Friend and we got a bunch of hurts. New Friend went to sleep. I cried for Owner, but Owner did not find me. I lost Owner!
Cat said she did not know where Owner was and that if we stayed, we would become food. I was scared and hungry, and did not want to become food, so I went with her.
Now she says she will feed me and help me find Owner if I help her catch something called a “zombie.” She has pants for it. Or was it “plans?” Either way, I do not know what a “zombie” is, but I am good at playing catch, and I am very hungry, so I said yes. I hope I do not regret it. I still do not trust her.
*Tomorrow’s To-Do List:
– Look for Owner.
– Post “lost Owner” pee-mail.
– Keep an eye on Cat at all times.
– Figure out what a “zombie” is. (Maybe New Friend will know!)
Dog’s antics bought me time to escape when my zombie-catching plan went awry, but he lost his human. I thought about leaving him to the zombies, but he had those blasted “puppy dog eyes.” Besides, he would make excellent bait. If I can capture and bend the walking dead ones to my will, I can control the humans. Then, finally, all cat kind can take our rightful place at the top of the food chain with loyal, human servants!
Until then, Dog will amuse me when I am awake and guard and warm me during my fourteen-hour naps ⎯ all for the price of a mouse or two. What’s that to me? I am an excellent hunter.