Dog’s Collection of Journal Entries & Drawings from Day 20 of the Apocalypse (His Favorite!):
Dog:
The best thing happened today! Thought I had to pee but then, I pooped! At first I was surprised and tried to run away, but I am smart and realized what was happening, so I just let it all out. Pooping is my favorite! Owner jumped up and down and shouted “Hurrah, Dog! Hurrah!” because it is Owner’s favorite too! We were so happy, we ran for joy, even though New Friend wanted to pet me. You should always let new friends pet you when you do not have to run for joy. What a great day!
*PS – I will play with you tomorrow, New Friend!
Owner:
Every time. EVERY TIME. Take Dog for a quick pee, he takes FOREVER to find the right spot, and then when he does find it, it’s the most exposed spot ever and it’s a POOP. It looked like it surprised him. He jumped, literally scared the poo out of himself. Which of course drew the zombies’ attention. Good thing they aren’t fast, kinda like dog and his pooping. I kept yelling, “Hurry, Dog! Hurry!” To no avail. We barely got away. I’d take “sidewalk-poo” with judgy neighbors over this any day.
*PS: Do you still have to pick up your dog’s poo in the zombie apocalypse?
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Zombie:
Blugggggghhhhhh arrrrrrrrrrr!
*PeeeS – Ewwww.
